The Second Act

Today is Tuesday, March 11, 2026 and tomorrow I turn 40.

Four decades. Countless world events, trials and tribulations, numerous Raptures predicted, one plague and I’m sure I’ve forgotten some. And, somehow, in the midst of this awareness and my keen ability to absorb, I never thought it would happen to me.

I’ve gotten older. Middle aged, even. And now, maybe from the memories (or social media), I’m aware of what I should be doing.

But, the truth is, I felt like glass for so long. Everyone could see through me and see all the hate I harbored for myself for never being right. This paralyzing, tumultuous self loathing I assigned to myself; surely people know I’m a piece of shit. I wrote off all of my kindness as the most basic level of humanity any person could offer another. My trusting, gullible nature just a side effect of being heinously stupid.

Fortunately for me, that piece is gone.

I have plucked out her eyes. I ground down her teeth and bit off her claws. Finally, a baptism of my own tears – the salty brine eroded me to this newly sharpened tool; ready to draft, create, crumble and die all over again. This fervent, fever-pitch belief in myself finally shaking me to wake up and stop being some statue looking towards a future I couldn’t grasp.

I don’t know what my hope is with this blog, beyond writing daily and chronicling my shaky steps forward.